Friday, 18 April 2008
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Reflecting back on my sons growing up I am beginning to realize the enormity of the very short time we really have to raise our gifts from God. You begin as two strangers leaving together and trying to get to know each other. A child blesses you and you begin to realize you were not as smart as you thought you were. From rolling over to crawling to walking to running, from no touching what's on the table, from first words, teaching politeness (I am a TEXAN and from the south), from please and thank you, first day of school and graduation from high school, to moving out on their own, to getting married. In all that time you are teaching your values to them. Going to Sunday School and Church and to all the kid ministries. Lessons at home that are entangled with the behavior that is seen in the public schools. Yet still trying to teach with more questions being asked and explanations sometimes not very meaningful. Praying that God has put his imprint on their lives. That their choices would be according to the standards found in scripture. And yet looking back you are trying to be a husband, a father, a businessman, Sunday School teacher, an officer in the church, a youth leader, five summer vacations spent with the kids of the church, and wondering if you didn't spend enough time with you own kids. Knowing even as adults your kids are still making tough choices. Are they going to church? Are they involved in Bible Study? How are they handling their money? Where do they hang out? Are they influencing or being influenced? What are their priorities? Do they love their parents? Is family important to them? All these questions and it seems sometimes no answers. Realization sets in.
Who is in control? Me or God? God's pace is different from mine. His wisdom is greater than mine. He is in control and he wants me to realize that and depend on Him. He instructed me and I instructed the boys. God gives the growth. May I not look and judge myself but rely on God and God alone. The cross casts a strong and mighty shadow and I need to rest in it completely and with no anxiety.
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Comments (2)
Thanks for the encouragement to keep looking at God. Today has been a struggle between spending time with my son and being "productive." You are one of a few people He has used today to remind me that being patient and loving with my son is more important than how much dusting I get done. Hope to see you today at the picnic. :)
I have been rumenating on these thoughts myself, Uncle Norvie. In fact, for the last several weeks, I hold Gracie Mae a little bit longer as I transfer her--sound asleep!--from our bed to hers at night. One day, Lord willing, I will walk her down the aisle and relinquish my authority over her to her husband. I know that day will come all too soon. So, I try to cherish the time we have now and pray that I will do right by her as the Lord has commanded me to do as a father.
Though I do my best to teach her to walk in His ways--it is not up to me, but Him, to see that she does. 'Duty is ours, consequences are God's.'